Talking Post #1

Hi, humans!

Well, yes, I haven't written anything for rather long time. Guess why? I'm lazy. I'm out of money and couldn't buy anything new to try out. I had no ideas what to write about. So I decided just to talk about some things I have in my mind.

I actually spent quite a lot of time with my friends outside. But now it's time to study again, time to work and I can't see them as much as I want. Very sad.

Plus, it's autumn now, time to have a depression! I have one problem, I call it "a syndrome of needless person". I'm this kind of person who doesn't trust people, at all. I have some quite close friends, I believe, but sometimes I think that they communicate with me only if they need something from me or when they're bored and don't have anyone else to spend time with. And I realise that it's not so, at least I honestly want to believe that, but it doesn't work most of the time. And it's killing me! I cry from time to time because of that and don't know how to deal with it.

I also have a special problem with one my friend. I used to think he's one of the closest friend of mine but I realised that it's not so. Or maybe I'm just ovethinking. Well, he says he would help me whenever I need it, I've asked for help couple times recently and what did I get? Hysteria or jokes. Nothing serious, no help at all. Ahahahah, now it sounds really stupidly, when I reread what I wrote I realise how silly it is. It seems like I'm 13, not 20 :) I just want to say that nowdays it's kinda risky to let anyone way to close. I have one best friend, and she IS my best friend like no one else. The rests are just old acquaintances. Not very positif, right? Friends are the main problem in my life after lack of self-confidence.

Anyway, I live with it my whole life. And I want to get drunk most of the time :) Autumn, what are you doing with me? Ahah... People, how do you deal with bad mood? And what bothers you this time of a year?

I really hope you're having good time in contrast with me :)

Just sayin.

Ciao!